Gobble Wobble Said the Jive Turkey

Somehow, my father has it in his stupid head that I only hate my “brother” because he yelled at me when I was a kid. Not even remotely freaking close. Here’s a list of reasons why I hate my “brother”:

  • Asshole behavior
  • Superior mentality (thinking that he’s better than me, when in reality he’s not better than the corn in my shit)
  • Treated me like total dog shit when growing up (blamed everything on me, even if I didn’t do it; convinced my parents that I should be punished for things I’ve done when in fact my parents wouldn’t have cared in the first place; yelled at me/slapped me; etc. etc.)

I could go on, but you get my point. My friend Anthony said that I should do the “Christian” thing and forgive him. Yeah. Okay Mister. If someone has treated you like dog shit your whole life and you personally want to forgive them, that’s on you. There’s absolutely no reason why the parasite should receive my forgiveness. Not even if he begged for it and apologized.

It’s too late for apologies. Way too late.

On a side note, there’s only two things I’m thankful for this year.

My brother’s stock value plunging and Blake.


Douche Baggeries!

I got a message on MySpace last night from this little douche bag. Telling me this:

douche bag

Now, to me.. this says.. “I’m pathetic. I’m a loser. I have nothing better to do with my time. Pay attention to me. All I wanna do is piss is you off because I’m a loser.” It’s more funny than anything. Why the fuck would I wanna take my video’s down? I’m glad the loser douche bag was traumatized from it.

Pure Gayness

I was just browsing some images through Google and I come across this:

Don’t get me wrong. If you’re a gay man and you want to wrestle other sweaty men, that’s perfectly fine. These men wear little tight undies or pants for a living. On top of throwing around beefy sweaty men. And the audacity to go around tooting yourself as straight. I’m sorry, but if you’re a straight male, why would you dress up in those clothes and then wanna touch another guy, who’s also wearing the same type of clothing. I don’t know. Seems a bit odd to me.


So, my penis video on YouTube has gotten close to 14,000 hits. All because it was featured on a web site called Something Awful. I’m on the front page… lookie:

Here’s the Revver link: Penis Size Video . I wish to not give out the ShitTube link, because those bastards are making plenty already. 😛

Anyways, people have been leaving all kinds of nasty comments about me. I think all of them are hilarious. The fact that I’ve never touched a penis in my life, yadda yadda yadda. If you’ve seen Blake’s brother, then you’d understand that any fat cow (his wife for example) can get laid. If that tub of lard (and I mean, TUB OF LARD) can get graced by a cock, I’m sure my pie hole has had some action.

Lemon Party! Yay! :P

They actually made a video:


My Opinion

Well, it’s about time I make another opinion. This time, it’s about this douche bag.

Well, what do I think? Let me tell you. After the douche bag pleaded guilty, he decided to take back his guilty plea, after it was announced in every single publication out there that he’s a gay bird. Did he not have a lawyer that told him not to plead guilty in the first place? I think he is gay. I mean, the governor right across the Delaware River, I forget his name, came out as gay. And that was that. Oh, I forget. Senator Craig is a Republican. And asshole Republican’s hate the gays. I would have more respect, even an ounce, if he had told the truth.

My Blake

For those interested in seeing what Blake looks like, here he is.

He decided that everyone should stop complaining, since he now is showing what he looks like. Happy now?

//Side Note: This is just a joke. Maybe. Maybe not.